Random views and tales for pet owners and animal lovers from a client-centred veterinary practice, boarding kennels and animal retailer in county Kildare. www.kildarevet.ie
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
The taming of the Tiger Cubs.
Thomas Byrne of Fianna Fail and Lucinda Creighton of Fine Gael both agreed with this audience's agenda for CHANGE, though differing in their view of what actual changes could happen.Byrne had the better of the exchange with a clarity of communication, three solid points and a speech without notes. Neither Politician could offer radical enough plans to satisfy this audience. A need to mobilise the unemployed, harness the educated, nurture and retain Ireland's investment in youth skills and training was, of course, widely agreed. But there was a gulf of understanding and a youthful frustration at the slow pace and extent of change which reflects the difficulties facing these young Politicians attempting to exercise power in a multilayered system of bureaucracy, vested-interest resistance and tradition.
Both TDs argued that becoming involved in existing political channels IS the most effective way to influence change. The increasing disillusionment and disengagement of younger citizens in Politics will lead to a self-fulfilling cycle which will only serve to enforce the status quo through an increasingly older electorate electing older Politicians.
Frustrations and misunderstandings were also manifest amongst the contributors. Bill Cullen was frustrated that this group, highly educated and highly skilled in the professions and trades, lacked the self-reliance, initiative, Can Do attitude and resilience of HIS generation. Architects, engineers, business graduates, carpenters,physiotherapists etc should do more for themselves argued Bill. A creed of self-responsibility which was met with sullen misunderstanding and a rejection of his perspective as that of an establishment capitalist.
But Bill is right. Most of that group have the skills to make their own living. Most have the tools, gained by education and training in the good times, to set up their own businesses, hang their own plinth, ply their own trades in their own neighbourhoods. What many of them dont have though is the street sense, people skills,ability to improvise and the practical survival instincts that Bill Cullen's agegroup have.
We have channelled the Tiger Cubs through well-oiled educational and training systems. Their fees were paid. Summer jobs were plentiful and cushy.Apprentices were well paid and valued. We instilled them with a sense of entitlement that they would never be subject to the inequalities, dead-end jobs and the emigration of our past. But the consequence of prosperity is that the well-funded, well-meaning, well-signposted scaffold of Ireland's social supports has domesticated the Tiger Cubs to see only the safe and structured channels. The expectation that the Government should provide is a clear legacy of the boom years.
The people "before profit" and the TCD student union heads and the soft-socialist young labourites like to think they are radical. But the wildest voice in the room last night was Bill Cullen's.The entire collective of Cubs failed to match Bill's passion.The most radical thought in the room was Bill's message of the mastery of one's own fate. The Cubs have been domesticated and tamed. But there is a solution.
The most innovative and visionary speaker in that room last night was a young software entrepreneur. The cross-pollination of Bill Cullen's school of hard knocks with the mosern globalised IT savvy of that young entrepreneur is needed to finish the Cubs education.My solution? Put business parks IN universities. Allocate incubation pods to IT startups IN Science faculties. Rent office space in business schools to entrepreneurs and to last years graduates. Incorporate participation in successful business projects into undergraduate work.
The Tiger is dead? Long live the Tiger!
Monday, February 15, 2010
The Jungle Book- We be of one blood you and I.
Even diseased or dull, the supple power, luscent pattern and very mystery of a rare serpent in the banal setting of a domestic Vet Clinic elicited a sharp intake of breath.
I thumbed through Kipling's "Jungle Book" over the weekend.Our python patient promptd me to remind myself of Kaa the Rock Python, a deep character of dark jungle mystery from one of my childhood favourite writings. The story of Mowgli the Man-Cub reared by wolves and mentored by Bagheera the Panther and Baloo the Bear.The chapter on Mowgli's snatched kidnapping by the Bandar-Log or Monkey people and rescue by Kaa, an awesome 30ft Rock Python captivated me again."And they the Bandar-Log fear Kaa the Rock Snake. He can climb as well as they can. The whisper of his name makes their wicked tails turn cold.Let us go to Kaa".
"They found him stretched on a warm ledge in the afternoon sun admiring his beautiful new coat,for he had been in retirement these last ten days changing his skin and now he was very splendid- darting his big blunt-nosed head along the ground, and twisting the thirty feet of his body into fantastic knots and curves and licking his lips as he thought of the dinner to come."He has not eaten" said Baloo as soon as he saw the beautifully mottled brown and yellow jacket" Be careful Bagheera!".
Reading parts of Kipling now as a forty year old I picked out social commentary and satire that was lost on me as a ten year old. "Listen man-cub" said the bear " I have taught thee all the law of the jungle for all the peoples except the Monkey-Folk who live in the trees.They have no law. They are outcaste. They have no speech of their own but use the stolen words which they overhear when they listen, and peep, and wait up in the branches.Their way is not our way. They boast and chatter and pretend that they are a great people about to do great affairs in the jungle, but the falling of a nut turns their minds to laughter and all is forgotten".This could be a commentary on our modern papparazzi or the tabloid media and those who inhabit its world.
There are also echoes of Victorian morality in Kipling which a ten year old boy might assimilate. Kaa the great aged Python assisted Mowgli's escape from the monkeys and afterwards surveyed the small boy."Have a care manling that I do not mistake thee for a monkey some twilight when I have newly changed my coat"." We be of one blood, thou and I"Mowgli answered."My kill shall be thy kill if ever thou art hungry, O Kaa".The Python dropped his head lightly for a minute "A brave heart and a courteous tongue. They shall carry thee far through the jungle, manling".True today as ever;even jungles have a code of ethics.
The attraction of owning an exotic pet such as Kaa the powerful python is hard for the faint-hearted to understand. But the challenge of caring for and gaining the trust of a complex serpent or reptile has its own rewards for some. My Python visitor had severe fungal pneumonia which I was able to treat with oral liquid antibiotic medication. He had lost weight, lost his lustre and a caseous scum across nose and eyes indicated severe debilitation.I was able to sherlock holmes my way to tracing the source of this disease to inhalation of mold grown on straw, an inappropriate bedding for a snake in a humid tank.
The snake hadnt eaten in a month. "What does he normally eat?" I asked his young owner. "Rats, the biggest whole ones you can buy frozen and defrost!" replied the young fella in gleeful Dublinese.I suspect a more gothic fascination with serpentine habits may motivate some exotic pet owners. To give him his dues though, he was under no illusions about his snake's potency and expertly restrained the python with extreme care as I gave the first antibiotic dose.
Anthropomorphism is a phenomenon we see in pet owners all the time.It means the attribution of human motivation and behaviour to animals.In fairness to this Python owner he was in no way anthropomorphic about his snake.But apparently thousands of owners are killed every year by their own exotic pets. Trust is their fatal weakness. Mowgli too was guilty of anthropomorphism as he initially was attracted by the monkey-people who play all day. Later however he cried bitterly as he realized their treachery "All that Baloo has said about the Bandar-Log is true. They have no law, no hunting call, no leaders- nothing but foolish words and little pickish thieving hands. If I am starved or killed here, it will be all my own fault".Kipling, the Victorian moralist now sounding like a 21st century ecologist.
One of those urban myths of a veterinary nature which I heard once at a Vet's conference goes like this- a python owner in the states had a snake for years and it grew to twentysomething feet long, grew to trust its owner and she it.The snake spent long periods of time out of its tank until the owner eventually let the snake pretty much have the run of the house and go in or out of its tank when it wished. Anyway by the by,she would wake up in the morning and find the snake on her bed which was not the least disconcerting for her. Instead, as a person living alone she found it strangely comforting. One morning she found the snake lying alongside her, cheek to jowl in the bed and happened to tell her Vet this tale of snakely companionship.
The Vet was luckily experienced in the ways of the footless hunter. He spoke with sharp and sudden urgency" Get that Python out of your house and into care immediately. Do not enter your home to get that snake on your own!".Kaa the Python had coldly reasoned that the time had come.He had been measuring up his owner and biding his time, sizing her up to swallow her whole.We be of one blood you and I.But trust is a weakness!
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Can you teach an old Dog New tricks?
This behaviour is known as spraying and is normally a territory-marking habit of entire male cats. In this instance I surmise that this Tom was neutered too late for his characteristic male sexual behaviour to change.
My answer was simply not to tolerate this, to keep the cat outdoors, to prioritise the comfort and hygiene of your own home over the disrespectful moggy's egotistical territoriality. My motherin law who is a farmer with a commonsense innate knowledge of animal behaviour texted me after the show. Her solution to that lady's cat issues would involve the combination of an open back door, a large boot and a feline projectile. There is a time for diplomacy and a time for action to paraphrase Ian Paisley and King Solomon.
Speaking of old dogs and old cats and new tricks, an owner of two springer bitches lives across the road from the clinic in Portarlington. Yesterday morning before heading to Tullamore for the radio show I stitched a few nasty bite wounds on the older bitch of the two who is now being bullied by the other bitch, her former friend. These new hostilities began after bitch one had a litter of pups which are now all weaned and are some four months old. One could speculate on the reasons for the new fights.Perhaps it is jealousy or perhaps the younger bitch now wants to assume the alpha or dominant role. Undoubtedly the recent presence of the pups changed the dynamic between the pair.
Our client collected his bitch this morning and against our advice put the first one straight back into the yard with the aggressor. Ten minutes later he appeared back in the clinic with his bitch newly lacerated and standing in a pool of her own blood. More triage followed. Now the course of action will have to be separate yards, a new fence and a period of acclimitisation across the fence before these two can MAYBE become pals again. OR maybe not.
Speaking of acclimitisation and indeed decontamination, the Boy George was very naive to think his self-proclaimed talents would automatically gain him a controlling role at the centre of Oireachtas power. George was hardly fulsome in his compliments of any of his Dail colleagues in his work with RTE. More loose cannon than messiah, in my view George's high decibel indignation as a reporter did more harm to Ireland's foreign credibility than good over the last couple of years.Both his own political colleagues and other parties'were therefore bound to keep him at arms length for a while until he gained some allies or victories. In any organisation the new boy has to use his elbows, his diplomacy and due diligence to gain management's trust. Why would Fine Gael be any different to any working environment?
In the climate of hype and hyperbole that the national media perpetuate the other argument we hear is that " George's talents" should have been "used". To do what exactly and how? The fact is that George is one of many well-qualified economists in the country. Economics is an inexact science. In economics the right answer is often only evident after the fact. Many more qualified economists than George have proffered as many different opinions as there are PhDs out there on the world economic stage. To pull one lever of economic policy is often only as wrong or as right as the political philosophy underpinning the policy. Trade unions, banks, brokerages, as well as political parties all have economists as well qualified as George. The best place for George is behind a microphone- dont mistake that talent for political talent.
Richard Bruton is still there and holding his counsel. The one shining light of the current government has been the finance minister Mr Lenehan. It is however likely that Mr Bruton will be minister for finance in the next government.
The old dog for the hard road.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
ASK THE VET- ALL OVER THE MIDLANDS!
This mondays first show will feature a chat about coursing and stag hunting, the new animal legislation as well as on air phone-in.
KFM's VETSLOT continues to grow in popularity every friday at 11.05.
I plan now to use this site to raise issues and answer queries that arise on air each week.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
FW: suggestion to help small business sector. Letter to Editor.
Subject: FW: suggestion to help small business sector. Letter to Editor.
Sir,
What the country now needs is an OBAMA. I am not referring to a prescription for soundbite political leadership, but to an asset management agency for Ireland's small business sector aimed at encouraging job creation.
The Ordinary Business Asset Management Agency would manage non-performing property investments of SME owner-managers, with conditions attached to ensure job creation and economic stimulus.
The interest-only repayments on that 500,000 euro lonely shannonside holiday home or shuttered flaking provincial commercial unit being approximately 2500 euro per month, I would surrender that property, but not the liability, to OBAMA. In return I would be bound to spend that 2500 euro per month on wages and PRSI to REEMPLOY someone, to creat a job, to grow my business.
Morgan Kelly of UCD's recent paper on the Irish Credit Bubble states" The property related borrowings of the owners of smaller Irish companies are now an impediment to their companies' survival and may lead to large job losses as owners are forced into bankruptcy over losses in property speculation. The destruction of the Irish entrepreneurial class may prove one of the most enduring and costly consequences of the property bubble."
Entrepreneurs define themselves by the successes of their business ventures and would prioritise their business' survival IF given a choice. Entrepreneurs will take knocks and pick themselves up again time after time. That is the nature of the beast.
If business owners were freed from the constraints of paying back large mortgages for secondary properties, cash would transfuse the small to medium enterprise sector, fuel growth of Ireland's GNP and get the private sector back to work.
Des Groome,
Chairman of Kildare Chamber of Commerce.
Kilcumney House,
Kildare town.
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FW: letter to editor, Banking Crisis.
Sir,
An inquiry into the causes, culprits and consequences of the Irish Banking Crisis is necessary.
If indeed there were illegalities of corporate governance committed, the public must see the rule of law upheld if only to preserve the credibility of law and order itself.
If misdemeanours of imprudence or bad judgement were committed, the public would be reassured if the right people were shown to be "accountable" if only to preserve some credibility for a future banking system.
Any bank now asking ordinary creditors to put themselves under duress to honour loan liabilities must apply new standards and ethics to its own practices.
Mr Cowen is incorrect that a banking inquiry would weaken confidence on the international markets. A new style of corporate governance and financial regulation would reassure and stabilise markets.
A tribunal style banking inquiry would not be appropriate on cost grounds alone. However a cross party Oireachtas inquiry, chaired by an international and neutral figure should be considered. An EU inquiry into the entire eurozone's banking practices, past and future, might also be useful.
Public discourse on this issue needs to continue as the aims and format of such an inquiry would be crucial from the outset. A facebook page has been set up" Call to investigate the banking crisis". Our banks customers, depositors, shareholders and the nation's tax payers need a say in the banking system we want to have.
Des Groome,
Chairman Kildare Chamber of Commerce,
Kilcumney House,
Kildare.
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Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Bucking the Trend- how SMEs can beat the recession.
The advice from Harvard Business school on this subject is to "plan strategically to be primed for growth" when the upturn comes. Large corporations strategise for growth by investment in R and D. Translating to small business, this means figuring out what you are best at and then continuing to do it- but figure out how to do it better and cheaper.
Competition is still the name of the game.Recession is an opportune time to look at what your weakest and strongest competitors are doing. Learn from both.
If you have a strong market size, then scour the market place and learn about the customers of your weakest competitors.What are these customers seeking that you do NOT provide? Look also at your largest competitors. Are they managing to hold market share in recession? Can you emulate any aspect of their service to become a real alternative for THEIR customers?Your competitors may be working all out to save their big accounts but that means there are smaller accounts you can go after.
In this climate customers' criteria have altered.Many now only shop for low price.But many also want quality AND value. In a sense your business challenge will be to help customers have their cake AND eat it. To do that you will need to manage the trick of cutting your costs without compromising service to customers.
You might call this challenge the "not throwing the baby out with the bath water" challenge. But DO throw out your prior assumptions and embrace new business practices, products, habits as well as those new customers.
If you are a small player you CAN gain ground.Bigger firms tend to have higher costs.They may also have clients disillusioned with a customised service. Perhaps you can work closely with that client and provide the personalised service they need. If you are a smaller player you should have less overheads and for that reason competing on price may be an option.
One vital point is this: don't forget to focus on your own existing clients, if you want to buck the trend you have to increase your client base, but if you do this at the expense of your existing clients then you will have only filled a void rather than gained ground. If you find that you want to gain more clients ensure that you don't do so to the detriment of what you have already worked so hard for.
Cut costs and look at your suppliers. Do you have any critical suppliers? If so get binding contracts in place so that they don't pass on any woes to their client base.
Many Irish subsidiaries of global players have passed the burden of shouldering stock equity losses down the line to you and I. I had two large global suppliers try to pass on four percent increases in early 09.By the end of 09 both were offering two for one on the same stock.
Oil prices are going to affect logistics and if you are in that business having set contracts in place would make a huge difference.Having a contract doesn't mean much if people refuse to honour it, but at least you are starting from a position of strength. If any of your suppliers are in danger of collapse, then you need to look for alternative suppliers should they be required or find ways to work with the present ones given different scenarios.Do not become over-dependent on any one source or product line.
Look out for talent!This may be an opportunity to get great talent at a great price. If you can access the labour market right now you may be pleasantly surprised by just how much 'bang for your buck' you get. If cashflow is an issue think about ways of keeping your own talent on board. A downturn will often make people re-think their tenure; last years demotivated employee may have a changed attitude today. Remember also that your hungriest and best performer is open to poaching by a market rival in survival mode. The last thing you want to see is your best employee leave because they are disenchanted or insecure.
You may have let some staff go. You need those who are left to work harder and assume new skills or responsibilities. Perhaps you need to promote by stealth, with salespeople or general operatives sharing management duties. You cant expect them to see the light at the end of the tunnel which only you have the belief in your business to see.Therefore even your best people will become jittery unless you communicate your vision, your destination; the where and the when it will all end. Leadership is about that vision, but mostly about communication.NOW more than ever, strong leadership is the asset you must bring to your business.
Get into the public eye. Nothing gives greater return on investment than some publicity. If you can talk about your business topic, then pass some information or public interest stories on to radio or paper correspondents. The media have a difficult job to do. They have to take any amount of information and turn that into digestible stories that are of public interest.'Newsworthy' is probably more important than 'news'.
Smart spending is key. Finding ways to really control your outgoings is vital. In terms of some online presence, a blog is a great tool for attracting web traffic that is interested in your area of specialty. Other sites may link to you on that basis and when they do that will help drive more traffic towards your site.
Look at sites you like then learn from their good features. Ensure that your phone number is clearly visible on every page and that contacting you is very simple. Clear easily found contact details are a must. As well, if your product or service can be bought over the web ensure that the process is easy. Paypal are great for the SME adding a web sale dimension.
Perhaps the single most important message in all of this is to keep marketing. Try new things.It's never too late to change your business model or to find a new angle. This doesn't mean being the cheapest. In fact that race to the bottom is expensive and creates more losers than winners.Locally focussed advertising yields strong dividends over time. You may not be able to gauge the results. What is important is for your business to become part of the local fabric of your town or community by your constant low grade public presence. Name recognition is your aim which is, after all,the essence of branding
Examine your business closely and try to find out what it is about you that makes clients come to you. Then do that again and again. Who isn't in the service industry to some degree? Imagine you got a carpenter to do a small job in your house. He shows up on time, does the job, accepts credit card, cleans up after himself and even uses a hoover to make sure all the dust is gone. Would he/she go on your phone for future reference? You bet they would!
Downturns mean people are looking for bargains. If you have stock that hasn't moved, then sell it as low as cash flow allows and use this to generate traffic to your business.Cash flow is the name of the game. Choose a " pay on demand" client over a credit client every time. Unless you feel you must do a job on credit ias a loyal favour to a good old customer. But dont be too loyal.
ISME's quarterly surveys pinpoint delays in payment as a critical problem for SMEs. Banks have stripped away overdrafts from those who werent using them. If you were using your overdraft, even depending on it, you have probably had your core debt put on term loan. We all give each other too much credit.Consider inviting your client to use a credit card to pay you; MBNA are in the credit card business, you are not.
Its a peculiarly Irish problem as credit is not expected, taken for granted or abused in many other countries to the extent that it is here.
The global recession has thrown up a new paradigm of marketing for customer expectation.Marketing gurus have commented for a decade or so on the phenomenon of the customer jaded by mass production.The demand for personalisation of service should have given the smaller businesses a larger niche but instead the large multinationals expanded choice and personalised their marketing strategies to keep ahead.The internet also empowered some customers by giving both knowledge and control over price and choice. What the internet lacks is the thrill and immediacy of a personal purchase. Big business has kept ahead because the honeypot of convenience and perceived value has allowed them to influence consumers to purchase high value goods or services with the bait of marketed loss leaders.
The good news for SMEs is that a new paradigm of consumer power is now emerging to add to the other five forces of business.Research shows that consumers will now pick and choose what and where to buy by new discerning ctiteria:whatever your niche is, IF you shout from the rooftops about it you have a better chance than ever of YOUR customer bypassing that aisle in the supermarket to selectively purchase from YOU. Shoppers will choose Tesco for some things, LIDL for others and now more than ever the farmers market for others. The principle of consumer power works for every sector. If I dont answer that nuisance ten pm call, a competitor will; my customer is now less likely to wait for me to suit myself. The SME which chooses to embrace the pros and cons of consumer power, to grasp the new paradigm, can use its own strengths of service and attention to detail to thrive through and grow out of recession.
Monday, December 28, 2009
FW: letter to editor- Brian Cowen,
Not so much a defence of Cowen but a comment on the interviewer.
The indo carried a full page interview with An Taoiseach in which Brian Cowen to be fair was very straight talking and came across as a very human, modest, team-building type of manager. The sort who would probably be a safe pair of hands in any organisation. I happen to believe that his pace of decision making has been too slow for the gravity of situation the country has faced. I believe his responses to the horror and hypocrisy revealed by the Murphy report were far too lukewarm. I believe his ambivalence to the Corporate malgovernance at Anglo-Irish leaves a lot open to suspicion.BUT political journalists in this country have gotten far too opinionated in the last few years and scarcely disguise their partisan leanings at this stage. A fact that they collectively need to be challenged on.
This letter to the Sunday INdo hopefully does that...
Sir,
I refer to Sunday Independent 27/12/09, analysis p29.
Jody Corcoran's feature analysis on Brian Cowen's toughest year was indeed revealing, not for its insight into Cowen's philosophy of power broking but for its explanation of how a political journalist, such as Jody Corcoran, feels a politician should or shouldnt use the media.
Corcoran cites Cowen's leadership style as " the antithesis of grandstanding" and puts it to Cowen that maybe he should grandstand now and again " for effect".
Cowen replies that he leads as straight as he can and deals with "the substance of the issues and gets on with the job".
Corcoran's exasperation, evident through his line of questioning, seemed to be at Cowen's obliviousness to political spindoctoring, media impression and populist showman politics. I dont believe I have ever read a journalist ask (a politician) would behaving in a particular way not be better POLITICALLY for you?
Has the wheel of political journalism in this country come full circle? Since the advent of the printing press, media have criticised politicians in general for a lack of sincerity and conviction. Is Cowen now being criticised for NOT playing the game, not grandstanding, not spindoctoring?
Readers, voters, the public at large have a choice. Listen to or read what the man Cowen says and does. Or rely on the interpretation of an exasperated professional media needing a media friendly, impression-managed Taoiseach to suit their presentation of events.
Cowen may be his own worst enemy in the game of words and images, but he is nothing if not consistent. Remember the triumphant return to Clara after the Taoiseach's appointment? What was the song he sang on the back of the flatbed truck? "I did it my way"!
Des Groome,
Kilcumney House,
Kildare town.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
FW:Call to Investigate the banking Crisis by oireachtas Committee
Most of my posts are informed by this vision of Ireland's best future and by the view that we need to get more productive, get our people working usefully, use the assets we have of good land, good food and great entrepreneurs. THAT future of Ireland, the lean global trader depends on better corporate governance, accountability in public life, social pluralism and a state with moral as well as civil authority.
gavinsbolg 21/12/09 is worth a look. He catalogues a trail of investigative journalism into bad banking practice and irresponsible regulatory inaction tracing back to 2005.
I have set up a facebook page Call to investigate the Banking Crisis by Oireachtas Committee. I am sick of the party that I once felt an ideological affinity with, responding inadequately or equivocally to the moral ambiguities that have typified much of Ireland's social structures. Colloquially I have recently commented that the country needs to be now taken apart and rebuilt. In a manner of speaking I do believe that reforms of government, civil service, church, banking, corporate governance are now needed on a scale that will change the shape of an already rapidly changing society. These are reforms that need to be led by the moral, tolerant, Right-centred, decent and enterprising people of Irish society. have a look at my facebook page and join this debate.
Date: Tue, 22 Dec 2009 07:13:09 +0000
Subject:
From: gavinsblog@gmail.com
To: groomevet@hotmail.com
| |
| The Regulator Posted: 21 Dec 2009 02:41 PM PST I don't want this post to seem like an "I told you so" post. But it might appear that way. I started irishcorruption.com/publicinquiry.eu back in 2005. One of the biggest issues myself and my uncle Anthony covered, and still cover on that blog, is the lack of regulation of the banks. And when the country was in a credit boom, and nobody, or at least very few, were asking questions about regulation of the banks, myself, and to a much deeper degree Anthony where highlighting this issue ad nauseum. Almost all of these posts were also copied to the office of the Financial Regulator. August 22, 2005 Toothless IFSRA August 25, 2005 Allied Irish Banks investigates itself September 28, 2005 Banana Republic October 10, 2005 Irish/Italian accountability November 15, 2005 The sheriff is not for the good guys December 13, 2005 Irish (Banks) Mafia December 23, 2005 Legal actions, dodgy dealings and resignations January 9, 2006 The (Irish financial) Wild West Show March 24, 2006 Still waiting for law enforcement March 26, 2006 Former AIB executives settle with Revenue for €323,313 June 7, 2006 Ireland – The Wild West of European finance August 1, 2006 Irish Financial Regulator – Bizarre and toothless August 2, 2006 Rampant corruption – rampant profits September 28, 2006 A corrupt state October 13, 2006 Bank robbers and bank robbers December 12, 2006 Failing to make connections December 14, 2006 Maintaining the illusion January 23, 2007 State contempt for consumers March 20, 2007 Irish Financial Regulator – Betraying the consumer April 4, 2007 The Financial Regulator, banks and credit unions April 25, 2007 Insider watchdog May 3, 2007 It's all in the mind June 17, 2007 AIB: Still ripping off customers with impunity June 13, 2007 Man of steel turns to straw August 23, 2007 A corrupt and secretive financial market August 21, 2007 Dublin – A conduit for dodgy deals? August 27, 2007 Dublin operation – A sloppily-run pig sty And that's just the first two years of blog posts. Never let anyone tell you that no one could have seen what was coming. |
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Friday, December 11, 2009
The giant pool
My story begins with the global pool of money. But where does it end? Bear with me. This, a giant global pool of all the money in the world contains all the pension funds, insurance funds, private savings. When my story begins, 1998, the global pool sums 36 trillion Dollars. Thats a million euro on the day of Christ's birth, a million the next day for you and every day since- with a couple of trillion left.
That giant pool is watched over nervously by an army of investors whose job it is to make it grow, to keep it safe.
Between 1998 and 2000, two things happened. First around 1998 the global pool of money began to grow very suddenly. All sorts of unexpected countries like Abu Dhabi, Korea, China began to globalise their money. second, Alan Greenspan, the head of the US fed reserve made a speech announcing that US government bonds would stay at 1%- very low interest- for a very long time.
Suddenly, that army of investors began to have more money than they knew what to do with and needed more SAFE places to put that money.
So- Wall Street created a new financial product called a mortgage backed security. What's safer than houses?
At this point I want to introduce you to the three Mikes.
The first Mike, Mike Soden, works for Bear Stern. He is an investment banker.He looks after the global pool of money. He buys mortgage securities with other people's money and nets his clients a few modest % return. It's safe as houses.
Next meet Mike Garder, head of silverstone Mortgage bank Nevada. They sell loans to people like you and I. They borrow millions from bigger wall street banks to sell us mortgages to buy houses. Then they take back the mortgages ,gather them together in bundles of 2 to 300 and sell them back to wall street in mortgage backed securities.
Before long Mike in Wall Street owns little pieces of thousands of mortgages sold by Mike in Nevada.
By 2003 everybody who qualified for a home loan OR already had one was in the pool. BUT Wall Street couldnt get enough of these mortgage backed securities.
So month by month guidelines got looser until Mike in Nevada says they were literally pulling people in off the street and offering them home loans.
Lets look at he different loan types-
First you had a verifed income, verified asset loan- a VIVA. Then you had a Stated income Verified asset loan- a SIVA.
These are triple AAAs.
But soon you just needed an accountants letter to get yourself a No income verified asset loan. Finally they started giving out the loan you know you are going to default on- the NINA ! NO income NO asset home loan!
You see it was a new era- banks didnt hold the loan for 30 years anymore. They just bundled them up into triple AAA securities and sold them back to Wall
Street.
Now you would be right to ask- Where was the regulator? and yes there were ratings agencies. But they had no DATA for these new loan types. They relied on historical DATA about how safe home loans WERE. They gave virtually all these securities triple AAA ratings. They were rated as safe as government bonds.
Year by year if Mike Garder doesnt give a guy a loan , the next broker will. If Mike Soden doesnt buy the latest scurities the next banker will.
Year by year market forces took over. But how do you turn a NINA- a No income loan which is set to default from day one- into a security?
Because they are not all triple AAA. You have double B and triple B in there as well. How do they fly?
Meet the third Mike. Mike Francis. Mike Francis runs Dynamic Finance, Ohio.
He buys some triple AAAs from Mike Garder. He buys a LOT of double BBs and a LOT of triple BBBs.
He grades them, values them, sorts them. Then he shuffles them.
He splits them into bundles of 2to300 called tranches to create a new financial product, a new type of "security".
They are called collateralised debt obligations. CDOs. And Wall Street cant get enough of them.
Because by this stage the global pool of money had reached 70 trillion.
Some of these loans are ToXic Waste. But Mike Francis is an alchemist. He turns bad loans into good securities. Bad money into Good.
Mike Francis is an alchemist. But by the end of 2005 you could almost smell the sulphur.
Meanwhile Mike Soden in Wall Street watches his screen every day and all these securities and all these CDOs perform. Nobody misses a payment. Mike sends his investors a little dividend every month and everyones happy. These are Performing Loans.
But Mike now admits it was the triumph of Data over common sense.
Because by mid 2006 the average American home loan was over 4.5 times the average American annual salary. That ratio historically used to be 2.5. A leverage of 2.5 is the ratio you and I are safely able to pay back. Mike says what Wall Street didnt know was that the toxic loans hidden in the CDOs were propped up in the malls and on the high street by another loan product- the home equity credit line. People were taking out another loan to pay their mortgage. Now that didnt matter as long as house prices kept rising because we are all property speculators by this stage. You are going to sell the house next year anyway!
But by mid 2006 house prices reached a critical level and stopped rising. House sales faltered. The loans stopped moving.
Mike says he remembers the day it happened, just before Halloween 2006. Some of the numbers on his screen started to blip. Some repayments were missed.
Mike's boss said" would you look at that.... What are the fed offering on bonds today?"
Wall Street stopped buying CDOs and securities. Mike Francis in Ohio was stuck with a load of CDOs. He packed up his chemistry set and stopped buying loans from Mike Garder.
There followed a winter of discontent as the cycle of lend-speculate slowly ground to a halt.
Mike Garder in Nevada was stuck with a load of mortgages and soon keys started coming in the door. No one was buying homes even if you did repossess as home owners here and there began to default.
Around february 07 when the bank itself defaulted on a couple of big repayments to Citibank, Silverstone Bank Nevada declared itself bankrupt.
Staff were told and then people began to literally wheel photocopiers out the door.
Mike says his boss called it the valentines day massacre.
To everyone else it was the subprime crisis.
Mike Francis in Dynamic Finance, Ohio, who had split up and sold on shares in some 16 million home loans simply filled in all the paperwork, sent it to Wall Street and pulled the door closed behind him.
By mid 07 the language changed. They stopped referring to it as a subprime crisis. The problem became known as a CREDIT crisis.
This is because Mike and the rest of Wall Street had lost half the global pool of money.
They have been badly stung and their investors are mad as hell.
So now they want NO RISK. Suddenly government bonds at 1% look very attractive again. Suddenly no one wants to lend.
This is why Hungary, Turkey and lots of other places are paying 15% and Ireland's interest rate is rising rapidly also.
We are mixed right up in it because the trail of CDOs reaches all the way to OUR banks who borrowed and hedged and sold on securities, who used securities AS security on risky Dublin site sales. A trail that culminated in a late night phone call to the minister for Finance in September 08.
My three Mikes, NOT the three wise Mikes, are my seasonal tale of the decade.
To put this into perspective, this IS where we are. Its NOT the great depression. Wall Street says its more like back to the 70s.
We are stuck in neutral for a while. You can take Uriah Heep's view- he was Charles Dickens fictional stingy accountant- " Happiness is a surplus, misery is a deficit" OR you can hold onto my final word from the Dalai Lama
" This world is not perfect. But things like happiness and unhappiness are relative. Realizing this gives you hope. "
END
Friday, November 27, 2009
FW: Kildare Chamber of Commerce , letter to editor.
From: groomevet@hotmail.com
To: editor@kildare-nationalist.ie
Subject: Kildare Chamber of Commerce , letter to editor.
Date: Fri, 27 Nov 2009 18:10:13 +0000
Dear Editor,
How do you persuade people that saving a few Euro on the Christmas Nintendo and Booze is the wrong thing to do? You cant- its only possible to fight fire with fire and fight a price war on price.
Throughout 2009 the small and medium business sector has cut prices, cut costs and adopted lean and innovative survival skills to keep the door to commerce open. Almost every business in Kildare, including mine, has made workers redundant, merged job descriptions, and added to the queues of the unemployed.
Those who remain in work are working longer and are filling broader roles. 40 hour jobs are cut to 32 and evenings or Saturdays are now worked without complaint. The private sector are now very close to the vision of the improved competitive economy which the ESRI and McCarthy report recommended.
Yet the queues northward get longer as we near Christmas. The local economy which is currently holding out for an upturn in trade will shed more jobs in the New Year if trade remains flat throughout Christmas.
Kildare Chamber of Commerce organised and funded an extended shop local campaign this year featuring a soldier fighting to keep Private Euro in our local economy and featuring the iconic uncle Sam's patriotic recruiting message "I want You" (to spend euros locally).
Any effective shop local campaign needs to achieve three aims. The first aim is to convince consumers that support for local business is essential to community life. The second is to inform shoppers of the value on offer locally and fight the myth that small local shops are dearer. The third aim of persuading businesses to provide better value can be achieved by rallying businesses into a group loyalty scheme, discount scheme or innovative PR campaign.
Kildare has everything to offer. A well stocked man's shop on the square with hidden discounts and Italian suits that could come from Louis Copeland. The everything shop on Station Road which challenges you to find cheaper. Christmas shops and pet shops and gift shops fly the flag for enterprise and service. Kildare farm foods have bigger and better turkeys than a Eurovision Semi-final. Retailers now compete transparently on price. Pubs and Restaurants now give group deals and two/three course specials so that no one should have reason to party out of town.
I am blowing the trumpet for Kildare. But there isn't a town in the county now that hasn't got it's act together and blown off the complacency and excesses of the so-called tiger decade. In my line of work I see plenty of Garfields. The Celtic Garfield is using up her nine lives and rapidly turning lean and fit for business.
We can win the economic battle, if we spend our hard earned euro at home. But if another half billion leaves the southern Irish economy in 2010, as it has so far in 2009, we can all play the blame game together on the dole queue.
Des Groome,
Chairman, Kildare Chamber of Commerce.
Kildare Vet Surgery,
Kildare Town.
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Thursday, November 19, 2009
Take a walk on the wild side
Fish are perceived as low maintenance pets and will be low maintenance when the set-up is right.
Hamsters, Gerbils, Guinea pigs can all be bought in pet shops along with the hutch, cage, beding, toys, food, drinker and often a care guide. They also rarely need to see a Vet.
Snakes and reptiles require a special interest and background learning. From Terrarium to feeding habits you will need to know what to do before you leave the shop.
Aquatic turtles and terrapins can come small but rapidly will out grow a small tank.
Outdoor tortoises are as of yet rarely seen in Ireland.
Tomorrows VETSLOT on midlands 103 at 10.45 followed by KFM's PETSLOT at 11.05 will deal exclusively with the exotics phenomenon tomorrow. TUNE IN
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Tigers, Leopards and political animals...
The Celtic tiger is to blame for the whole thing of course. A once sleek and fit for purpose feline which started life as a lean sophistocat with an engine that purred like an Asian car plant. Softly- padded and sure of foot, the tiger negotiated Brussels bureaux and summit tables and always got the cream. The tiger had circus high wire skills. The tiger deftly walked the tight rope of fiscal generosity for a decade and relied only on the safety net of property taxes. A safety net which the circus ring masters of global banking dismantled. An extended cast of bull markets and bear traders grace the stage alongside pantomime characters with unlikely names like fannie mae, freddie mac and the biggest villian of all; seanie fitz.
The celtic tiger had many litters. But the tiger cubs were too well fed. This now presents all sorts of problems for the tiger herself. Firstly the cubs are now too costly to feed. Secondly, like many kittens who have never needed to learn to hunt, their teeth and claws are not fit for the pecking order of the global jungle. Which now means they are too difficult to rehome. The ailing tiger herself has lost a few lives, though strong survival instincts have activated chameleon qualities; proud euro-spots grown to show monsieur trichet et les autres bureauchats. Stars and stripes on the soft furry underbelly of the celtic tiger, turned purring Garfield, to show Top Cat Uncle Obama.
The tiger is now unrecognizable. Not merely a domestic long hair in need of a financial haircut, nor is she simply a leopard losing spots, nor a fat cat shedding toxic fluffy equity. Now, battered and one-eyed, the still game tiger is growling defiantly as she awaits 77bn euro surgery.
SPVs ( special purpose vets) and spindoctors are working to amputate her gangrenous and clubbed construction limb. Eurochats in the waiting room lap up watery stimulus packages as they watch the tricky surgery. Sagely, these mandarins all agree with the consensus that the tiger must grow a few diversified extra limbs if she rises phoenix-like from the bonfire of the celtic vanities. Former memories of the once proud tiger may soon belong to mythology. Consigned to cautionary nursery tales, like the one-eyed yellow idol on the pass at Kathmandu and Macavity the mystery cat.
The tiger cubs continue to cause trouble. These toothless kittens were reared on a diet of tuna, sardines and cream. The fluffy malcontents are growling in the alleys as they face cheaper kit e kat and lidl kibbles. Even Alberts famous high end pet food factory burned to the ground as the circus left town. Defiantly the cubs soiled their own litter trays and turned their tails on Lisbon one. Returning a no vote to the urbane eurochats was understandably seen as biting the hands that fed them. Mercifully, the cubs put tail between their legs and accepted what was on offer the next time.
Now that the circus has left town the story tellers of media have unleashed a whole host of other circus animals.Lisbon one began as serious cliff hanger. There was a brief cameo by neo-con Libertas Eagle. But no twist in the tale this time as radical tail failed to wag the dogged consensus!The NAMA factor featured a battle scene with thorny birds Joan of ArkBurton and Prince Richard the brut-on against assorted shylocks, fatcats and soldiers of destiny. By now tired and bloated, the Fianna sought the salmon of knowledge through the NAMA debate as the Druids read the tea leaves.
Tangential subplots amused the worn audience. The Bull ODonoghue and his crock of gold; the old bull was just full of bull as limousines and party hats and cheltenham horses trotted across stage. The bull mistook his invisibility cloak for an invincibility cloak as the media pursued him into the owner's and trainer's bar at Listowel. The Ceann Comhairle, no longer sacred cow, was gleefully butchered.
Through all the caricature slow starter and dark horse Lenihan has refused typecasting.
The budget is now looming and defies panto scriptwriters.The outcome depends on Dark horse Lenihan, heavily handicapped, hobbled yet determined as the remaining circus animals jockey for position. Cue left, the last creature of the tiger era emerges to do battle. The slowest and largest animal will trumpet the final act towards curtain fall and hopeful sequel. Costs must fall, productivity must rise, overtime must be cut, services must deliver value. Pigs might fly. Take a bow Lenihan and face the elephant in the corner!
Friday, November 6, 2009
Mysteries of the animal kingdom!
I have begun this October an MA in Communications in DCU which I am finding deeply rewarding and diverse after a decade in the trenches of animal health care. A colourful, bohemian and bearded Professor of journalism whose lectures I attend said that angry little epistles belong on the blogosphere but facts speak for themselves. I will let the economic facts speak then and may the rain spill on the marchers! Forearmed in future with formal communications skills I hope to maintain the upper hand in jousts with Clem Ryan on my Friday morning KFM VetSlot. This afternoon I would like to cover questions we didnt get to answer this morning and, with apologies to dear frankie, answers I would love to give- but cant- on air;
Mary from Coill Dubh has a sheepdog with an itchy ear and is wondering what Des would suggest-
Well Mary I would suggest you bring the poor dog to a Vet. Contrary to popular belief these things dont get better being watched. Otodectes Cyanotis or ear mites left untreated can render your dog deafer than a snoozing monsignor, more lobsided than a PPP negotiation and with bigger cauliflower ears than Paul OConnell.
Pauline in Nurney has a goldfish that seems to be turning white and she is wondering what is wrong with him?
Pauline, your goldfish is faced with an identity crisis more serious than a Towers man who togs out for Ellistown and a questioning of his raison d'etre on a par with that of the Moorefield man who crosses town to Sarsfields.Clearly a Goldfish needs to be golden. Jacksonesque colour-change is as good a reason as any to visit your local struggling Vet.
Ann in Kildare's son wants pet mice and she is wondering are they difficult to look after?
Ann! Yes they are difficult to look after, never more so than when they make a break for freedom and discover the cosy sanctuary of your back kitchen. Send your son up to me for a few saturdays to figure out what type of pet he really wants.
Margaret just had a baby and her terrier that she has for about five years seems to be very jealous and is always trying to jump up on her when she's holding the baby and keeps barking at the baby. What can she do?
Margaret, Your terrier is deeply psychotic and determined to check out just how closely baby flesh resembles the taste of chicken. Your terrier invisages a baby free resumption of the status quo where he will have you to himself again under the assumption that eaten baby is soon forgotten. Your dog is five plus. Professional dog trainers can teach old dogs new tricks- but you havent a chance of doing so. Its gonna be either the terrier or the baby- not exactly a dilemma of Solomon-like proportions.
Remember folks- your pet is a member of the family- but not a human member!
Monday, November 2, 2009
Commercial Announcement- Pet Food!
PROPAK have a diet to meet any dogs need, whether it is a medical need, a breed requirement, or a special need of growth or pregnancy. The colour coded range comes in a range of sizes to suit any size of dog and owner's pocket. The puppy trial size is especially popular.
We retail PROPAK at 40 to 50 % cheaper than any other specialist food range.
I can Guarantee also that you will not find PROPAK cheaper in the county.
As Vets we stand over PROPAK and are using this diet range successfully to manage diabetes, obesity, pancreatitis, irritable bowel disease and dermatitis.
Moreover we will always support local providers when we have an opportunity to do so.
You can buy your food at rock bottom discount on our website using paypal
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
FW: Letter to editor - re Donal Og
Parental attitudes still have a long way to go?..
Dear Madam,
The recent " coming out" of Donal Og Cusack has created barely a murmur in conversation, in press or on the media around county Kildare. This could be because our views around the issue of homosexuality have changed in recent years. Perhaps this issue is greeted with a shrug of the shoulders and regarded as barely news worthy. If that is the case then it is a good thing, signalling a broadening of tolerance in attitude.
It could also be because he is a hurler. Hurling is a minority sport in Kildare. In fact it has been said that in Kildare, hurleys are mainly used as instruments to keep down the thistles. A story about a Cork hurler attracts less local interest than say a story about a footballer, or a jockey.
The weigh rooms of Punchestown, Naas, The Curragh and other racecourses remain citadels of swashbuckling machismo.
A " coming out " from within the daredevil profession whom an ambulance follow around as they ply their trade would be the ultimate test of public attitude. A " coming out" of a National Hunt icon would surely strain the fragile liberalism of the midlands. As racing pages and pencils are dropped in a shocked silence around Kildare's betting shops the richter scale would perhaps just register a little tremor.
yours etc,
Des Groome,
Kilcumney house,
Kildare.
Come out, come out, wherever you are....
Thursday, October 22, 2009
FW: letter to editor- Drink Driving Debate
Comment-
Rural backbenchers under pressure- Legislation shouldnt have to be a popularity contest!
In fact, The Nationalist of Oct 28th printed this- thank you to the editor, Barbara.
Dear editor,
As opponents of Minister Dempsey's proposed new drink driving legislation once again pressurise their elected representatives there is a need to examine this emotive issue with new thinking. Prime Time's feature of Thursday 22nd October presented incontrovertible evidence that reduction of the drink driving limit to 50 mg from 80mg will reduce annual national road deaths by 10%. Indeed experts cited 18 road accident victims in 2008 in Ireland where the dead were found to have blood alcohol levels between 50 and 80mg. This refutes the argument that in many cases a couple of drinks will not impair driving.
Vested interest groups can not see beyond the defence of their right to allow drinkers to drive quietly home, to acknowledge the need to legislate for the common good. I recommend pinning responsibility for solving this issue squarely back onto those with the largest vested interest- the publicans and drinks industry. A simple solution of providing transport as part of the bar trade's basic customer service could be cheaply introduced and could quickly become the norm.
A publican could absorb a small minibus or people carrier into the business' cost base for less than 500 euro per month assuming a 24,000 euro lease over 5 years. This becomes a business asset both for its mobile branded advertising and for it's vital function of ferrying customers to the pub. A publican would then devise collection and drop-off routes and routines.
An 8pm to 9pm collection loop for OAPs on a wednesday with a homeward loop from 12 to 1, perhaps. Fridays and Saturdays would, it is hoped, become busy enough to require the enterprising publican to send the van out on several pick-up and drop-off runs.
The increase in visiting drinkers would more than compensate for the cost of this drinkers' shuttle service and driver's salary from the publican's viewpoint. The vital social benefits of publican provided drinkers' transport would be safer roads and the re-establishment of social contacts in both rural communities and among the less well off who currently deterred by taxi costs are drinking , perhaps to excess, at home.
yours etc,
Des Groome,
Chairman , Kildare Chamber of Commerce,
Kilcumney House,
Kildare,
groomepetvets.blogspot.com
Monday, October 19, 2009
FW: Letter to Editor.
From: groomevet@hotmail.com
To: independent.letters@independent.ie
Subject: Letter to Editor.
Date: Mon, 19 Oct 2009 13:26:59 +0100
In fact, this was not printed by the paper. Badly written, poor commentary- or Myers doesnt air criticism ?
Dear editor,
K.Myers wrote in the Irish Independent of Friday 16/10/09 "I am grateful to a reader for the following from the Great Green Plan...which says all we need to know about this bossy bunch of scary lunatics"We will develop a template for the establishment of farm-gate shops and ensure that the necessary legislative arrangements are made to facilitate this".K. Myers is apparently critical of this Green party plan to foster farm-gate shops as he then writes a stream of consciousness in which Myers positions a farm-gate shop at the centre of an Enid Blyton children's story. I have a number of questions after reading his piece-Is Myers crediting Enid Blyton with the prescience to predict and endorse a growing self-help movement of the rural economy in the 21st century?Or is he simply writing to appeal to the one third of Ireland's population - those over the age of forty, of which I am one-who MAY have actually read Enid Blyton?
Myer's criticism of the farm-gate shop movement is wide of the mark and unhelpful to our economy's current weaknesses for the following reason; Ireland's is a small open economy in which the majority of what we consume is imported and the majority of what we produce is exported. This model of Foreign Direct Investment dependency was successful in contributing to the phenomenal growth of Ireland's GDP from 1993 to 2007. However the weakness of our dependency on global trading has been exposed during recession. In short, now we in Ireland lack sufficient indigenous means of production, across the entire commercial spectrum, to stimulate sufficient internal cash flow to power our own economy towards recovery. The farm-gate shop movement is one means of stimulating the local economy by generating cash flow for commercial farmers, small food-producing business, small shop-keepers and creates a virtuous circle of cash retention in the local economy. The current reality of farming for the factory and consuming the imported produce of foreign multi-national retailers is contributing to rural and small town unemployment and the shrinkage of our SME sector.
The farm shop movement is of growing economic importance in the UK where there is now a growing market for fresh food from known local sources. Here in county Kildare we have a number of thriving farm food outlets which the local consumer is responding to. The message is travelling across Ireland's SME sector. Countrywide, we now see shop local campaigns successfully spreading the message of spending local euros locally. There is a growing understanding that spending our euro in local producers and local small businesses benefits all of us. The SME sector is the engine of our economy. The self-help principle of the farm shop could be the starting point for recovery and for a new vision of the future shape and balance of Ireland's economy,
yours etc,
Des Groome,
Kildare Vet Surgery,
Chairman, Kildare Chamber of Commerce,
groomepetvets.blogspot.com
In defence of rural enterprise
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Hip Replacements and the HSE
Our private family health insurance with Hibernian Aviva has been the most important two thousand euro we have spent every year for the past decade. We have two sons who were born with congenital heart defects. Our health insurance and ability to pay ensured we obtained immediate expert care. We have never been at the mercy of the HSEs waiting list and both boys have survived and thrived. My own experience of surgery, albeit as a Veterinary Surgeon, is that the margin for error is still high for orthopaedics, high caseload is the key to success, risks of infection are one in two hundred ( too high). Prognosis is also influenced by both attention to detail in hospital processes and post-operative nursing care and expertise. My health insurance gave me the option of an excellent private orthopaedic surgical facility with only a few weeks of a wait.
I mention this to make two points. Firstly I am an advocate for universal health care for Ireland. Every citizen has the right to the same care that I had to shop around for. But the internal costs of that excellence will be high and attempts to seek efficiencies in cost will always create inequality unless excellence becomes the only standard measured. The HSE have moved Cancer Services now to eight designated centres of excellence, with plans to discontinue cancer services in thirteen smaller hospitals. This is a recognition that multi-disciplinary management in centres of excellence acheives excellent prognosis. It is also a recognition that in the high mortality context of cancer excellence is the only standard we should measure. Secondly, I am self-employed and would rather work than not, my insurance card moved me up a queue into a private bed and will help me regain productivity and run my business again in the shortest time possible. A medical card holder in my position would wait six to nine months for a hip replacement and would be medically signed off work for all that time. Unemployable because of pain, this medical card holder costs the state in welfare payments and loss of productivity. Not to mention the administration costs of a two tier system whereby that person may have the same surgeon as myself, but is queued in a different list and assigned to a different hospital.
So it was that I went under epidural and had a Bermingham right hip prosthesis implanted. This is a metal on metal resurfacing technique of screwing in a new tightly fitting metal ball and socket. More of us will have this type of surgery as life expectancy for males rises by 8% to the year 2036. The post-op information describes the surgical aftermath" You will then be able to start walking first with a frame and soon with crutches". This breezy optimistic prediction proved to be spin of Alastair Campbell proportions as I lay stuck to the bed with pain for the first few days. I dragged my misshapen, swollen and lead-weighted right leg to the edge of the bed only by the use of the two-handed hospital trapeze swing made famous by "Jerry Maguire".But there were five hips done in Blackrock that day and the nursing staff knew exactly what pain scores were normal and when precisely to rescue the average Irishman from his own low pain threshold. Furthermore their helpful post-op brochure went on to say" Normal sexual activity can be started again at 6-8 weeks. Although the warning about avoiding extreme positions of the hip applies." But of course you can never believe everything these doctors tell you. Just how well do they make artificial hips anyway ? Even cars dont need a running-in phase these days.
From my own bitter experience I can agree with the findings of a 2008 UCC School of Nursing Survey. Published in the Journal of Orthopaedic Nursing, findings reported pain to be the predominant physical experience after hip replacement, pain was more intense than expected and importantly the absense of a pain nurse specialist contributed to inadequacies in post-op pain management. The survey found that in some centres patients pain was still poorly assessed and concluded that pain management remains a major challenge for orthopaedic nurses in Irish hospitals.
Our expectations of care are very high as we know the excellence that can be acheived in Irish hospitals. We shouldnt suffer in silence. My professional insight into the challenges of infection control, pain control, margin of error control ensured I went to a centre of excellence to have a hip replacement which even so was difficult, very painful and not without setback. I believe everyone to be entitled to that level of care. A margin of error is not acceptable; someone elses brother or grandmother shouldnt suffer as a percentage with infection, bed ulcer or pain just because they have a medical card or because whats not accepted in Blackrock is tolerated somewhere else. But we shouldnt expect that excellence to be available around every corner. We must recognise that excellent people are rare, that standards remain a challenge, remain dependent on people. If medical experts CAN guarantee standards in some locations then we must accept that other locations may have lower case load and consequent resources and expertise scarcity. Those who have fought the removal of some services from regional hospitals have carried placards " Death By Geography"and seek to preserve the availability of specialist service at their own regional hospitals. But they miss the vital point that on the whole list of factors that influence positive prognosis- the medical list- geography is absent. If we allow local concerns to determine where we provide specialist care to patients then we have to expect a margin of error.And then death by geography will become a reality.